Identity Crisis
Moving on from my previous post, I was going to blog about something that crossed my mind while typing it last night. However, it seems Morquendi has beaten me to it on Nittewa.
My point being – what defines your identity?
I spoke to some friends of mine. Apparently, whatever the scholars say, most average people seem to equate identity with name, ethnicity, nationality or religion in most cases. And it would seem that many people will pass judgement on others based on these labels… a practice that has been carried forward throughout human history.
He hath disgraced me, and hindered me half a million; laughed at my losses, mocked at my pains, scorned my nation, thwarted my bargains, cooled my friends, heated mine enemies; and what’s his reason? I am a Jew. Hath not a Jew eyes? hath not a Jew hands, organs, dimensions, senses, affections, passions? fed with the same food, hurt with the same weapons, subject to the same diseases, healed by the same means, warmed and cooled by the same winter and summer, as a Christian is? If you prick us, do we not bleed? if you tickle us, do we not laugh? if you poison us, do we not die?
– Shylock, from Shakespeare’s Merchant of Venice
The labels we give to distinguish ourselves have hardly ever been used for a good purpose. But what bothers me is how these archaic labels still exist in our global village. Why is it that even at a time when we are so clearly able to see that the biggest differences among us are figments, we continue to revel in these labels, directing hate and passing judgement on those we feel are different from us?
Maybe a few hundreds of years ago, when travel between nations was rare and multi-cultural towns were exclusively sea-ports or trading posts, the labels had more meaning than they have today.
How do you define someone’s ethnicity today? DNA testing – or do you take their word for it? Does following a particular religion mean you have the right to put down the followers of another religion?
What about the people who are born into a race or religion they don’t like? Are these matters of personal choice or social custom?
What if you were born abroad, in a country different from that of your parents’ home – but were brought up in a totally different country? What would be your nationality?
Personally, I’m proud to be Sri Lankan. I’m proud of what my ancestors achieved in the past.
But I will not be defined by society’s whims or the ruins of my ancestors. Frankly, I’d rather just be me. I will define who I am by my actions. I’m thankful to my friends, who by being themselves and constantly challenging my beliefs, help me maintain my individuality. Maybe I’m being an idealist, but I would rather be an idealist seeker of the truth than a hypocrite defined by the company he keeps.
I will define who I am by my actions that’s the way. most people are simply afraid of being themselves and the freedom that brings. only, you have to be honest to yourself about the real motives of your actions. it doesn’t matter what the actions are, you just have to know why you are doing it and take the full responsibility for them yourself.
sittingnut
30 Sep 05 at 1:57 am
I sometimes claim to to be Tamil by descent, Sri Lankan by residence and English by choice.
Given the dreadful state of the country I’ve been mulling over calling myself Ceylonese, after all I was born (and spent someof my childhood) when it was still called Ceylon.
Jack Point
30 Sep 05 at 5:47 pm
Yeah – I’m with you Jack Point – what’s wrong with being Ceylon apart from it’s a little nostalgic …
ashanthi
30 Sep 05 at 9:51 pm
Hey Whats up Dulan…
first of im a bit excited since its the first time im commenting in your blog … not at all a blog person … i think im going to get addicted to it eventually.
My problems come up when i try to define whats Sri Lankan and I frankly dont know how to tell a caste just by the surname. What this means to me is what I think of when you said ‘ But I will not be defined by society’s whims or the ruins of my ancestors.”
But … and this is a huge but ….with age ..and a few white hairs… i feel , in a weird way …a pull from my family … to get into the same boat…
and row row row ya boat…da da da da daaa
Dasitha
6 Oct 05 at 5:17 am
Jack Point, ashanthi:
So is this…
(01) Ceylon under european imperial rule
(02) Ceylon between 1948-1956
(03) Ceylon after 1956
…?
Just a thought…
Dasitha:
Well… yeah, I suppose family can pressurise you into taking up a particular stand. But the things is bro, I’m not talking about how other people define you. How do you define yourself? Do you need to be defined by other people – or do you choose how to define yourself?
Dulan
9 Oct 05 at 10:18 pm
Hey, how r ya,
Dulan very kindly introduced me to the world of blog, knowing my love for writing and music thinking no doubt that exposure to others
more cultured in these things would finally show me what I’ve been lacking all this time…talent…
But I see that the blog is able to offer me more, and this particualr topic of identity could not have been better timed. But before I let my own humble opinions helter skelter on the page let me tell you who I am; I am on of those people who are unflatteringly called ‘Goda Suddas’, basically a native who acts like he’s more accustomed to eating burgers at macies rather than having a kottu at Jai Bawan. I’m more inclined to listen to ‘Pantera’ or ‘Marvin Gaye’ than ‘Clarence’ or ‘Jothipala’ and yes I do have the customary fake (I admit it) american accent. One of my best friends described me beautifully on the day I left for Autralia, he said; ‘Dude, u’re a Sri Lankan in Autralia with an american accent’…talk abt ure multiculturalism.
Now here’s the funny thing, after I came to aussie I found myself unconciously sifting thru my ‘roots’. My singhalese roots, and with it I found a new appriciation for this culture. And isn’t it a wonderful culture? the music, the language, the tradition? (I’m quite aware that I sound like a tourist, but please beare with me) so now how do I identify myself?
Well that was easily solved because, along with this I discovered, or rather ‘re-discovered’ something else, something that has set apart not only our culture but also our country, being like a blessing that endures despite the steady demise of the institution that was meant to uphold it.
Buddhism.
Now I understand how this may (well, not may but in fact will) ruffle (well, maybe more of ‘strip naked’ than ‘ruffle’) some people. For one thing I’ve inadvertatnly stated that to be singhalese is to be buddhist. Not true, in fact I think that the whole misconception stems from our identification with culture.
Buddhism belongs to no race, it belongs to everyone and its truth lies within everyone.( I can’t speak for other relegions but I welcome anyone to comment on this particular point.)
I’ve heard a number of political solutions being presented to solve matters in our home land, but I think now would be a good time to look for a solution within our religious communities rather than our political or cultural affiliations.
I do admit that this possibly gves rise to more problems, and I would appriciate it if those wiser than myself would point these out….(Bring it on…) but seriously, we’ve tried holdin hands and working towards a solution as singhalese and as tamils. Why not give it a go as Buddhists, Christians and Muslims?
I’m going to submit this now and I hope I’ll get some response…I just have one last thing to say…be kind…
here goes….
Dillon
10 Oct 05 at 2:38 pm
First of all should thank Dulan bringing me on this blogs world, which I never had any expierience. Dulan taught me a lot abt internet, and thank you for that……..
))))))))
I have a little bit of an expierience living in a wetern country and being a minor,,,,,,,,,,,No one s gonna say u r a english , or Australian even u r born in that countries…..To be calleda s that u r skin should be white…….U r ancestry counts when you go out of your place of origin…………..
So in my opinion there ‘s only one nation in the world , that’s called HUMAN……………Thats what I believe in ………………
People may have different cultures and different ideas………..
And u have to identify u by u r self , and hve to be a unique person……..
I think Dulan has it…………..He s unique ………………
K K
20 Oct 05 at 4:05 pm
Dulan – I like your friends, they’re reallly polite!!! Wish Morquendi had some nicer Sinhalese friends.
Yep – Amen to the Human nation.
It’s true about the skin colour thing – but it’s also equally true that I take great pains to educate people that “no – I am not Indian” but a Sri Lankan Tamil. The next sentence is inevitably about food or the Tigers.
I love getting onto the food thing. I have these special bottles that I put curry powder into & give away! If I have to answer questions about the Tigers – well it sort of wears me out a bit. You feel so responsible for what they have done. I cannot justify suicide bombings – full stop, I have nothing to say for that. On the other hand I know how the whole thing has come about & why people became so desperate.
So as with everything for me re. Sri Lanka – there is so much pride, nostalgia, saddness & yes (I sure you”ve noticed!) anger. Ceylon is like living with unrquited love. It’s undying & the real thing but you get almost nothing back.
Except since the Tsunami & finding Morq’s blog, I don’t feel quite as lonely anymore. It’s very tough living in place where there are just no Sri Lankans at all that I can talk to – not one.
So hope you all don’t mind me talking to you
ashanthi
30 Oct 05 at 3:13 am
sorry – i’ve had some very bad news to deal with. I think I’ve actually gone into grieving mode, not being very clear…
Dulan – that would be Ceylon after 1956.
Yep – I’m Ceylonese, lost & drifting all alone. The worse thing is that I am only going to get even more lonlier as all my older family pass on in all 4 corners of the world. I don’t speak Tamil very well & i find it really hard to mix with my own kind. I don’t know why. An English boyfriend of mine once told me I was more British than he was – no he wasn’t trying to insult me – just make a point!
So Dulan – I’m happy to be Ceylonese. I can look back at that time & still feel a little bit happy about what our country used to be (no I’m not an old foggy either – just 25). You know what I mean – Jack Point – help me out here.
What’s that other song … “Not Drowning, Waving”???? Yep well – it’s not true – I am drowning
ashanthi
30 Oct 05 at 3:29 am